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reader discussion

Reader Discussion: Would You Rather Eat Castlevania Wall Turkey Or Final Fight Floor Turkey?

by Kyle Hilliard on Nov 23, 2016 at 11:00 AM

We've eaten a lot of questionable garbage as video game heroes. We've rooted through the trash to improve our health, swallowed pain pills found in subway bathrooms to laugh off death, and imbibed questionable liquids hoping for the best. These turkeys, however, stand out as an anomaly.

Both appear to be fully cooked, which is not something that happens accidentally or in nature, and both have been placed on plates. Someone put a lot of effort into making and plating these turkeys, which makes their discovery all the more mystifying. How did they end up where they are? Who made theses? Why does it restore so much health when real turkey makes you sleepy?

We're not answering those questions here. The question today is which one would you rather eat. Dracula's castle in Castlevania is full of horrors, but inside a wall is a pretty good hiding place. Final Fight's turkey isn't hidden, making it more susceptible to outside interference, but you also don't have to worry as much about asbestos.

Which would you rather eat? You can't choose both. Make sure to think about this while eating turkey tomorrow.