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Feature

The 15 Most Insane Things You Can Do In Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus

by Javy Gwaltney on Oct 30, 2017 at 03:42 PM

Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus is a heavy game. It deals with themes of racism, the holocaust, child abuse, and despair. It's also very zany. Enough ink has been spilled about the somber themes of this game SO let's talk about all the wacky things you can get up to. Just so you know: there are a few HUGE spoilers at the very end we've put a notice before so you can avoid them if you feel so inclined.

1. Tackle A Nazi Into Red Mist
Halfway through the game you get access to one of three 'contraptions' that give you access to super powers. One of these contraptions is called the Ram Shackles. The Ram Shackles essentially turn your sprint into an offensive tackle that, when you've built up enough speed, will splatter any Nazi you hit into a gory, meaty explosion. 

2. Fight The Ku Klux Klan
While you don't technically fight any KKK members during the campaign, you can revisit sections of the game districts on your war map in New Orleans and Roswell to bash in the heads of murderous racists.

3. Goomba Stop A Nazi
Want to get a little Mario in your Wolfenstein? Jumping above an enemy and then pressing crouch will result in B.J. descending to perform an all-powerful butt stomp that will shatter them.

4. Butt Heads With A Robot Man
The Supersoldaten are annoying not just because they have super powerful weaponry but also because they have a rocket-fueled tackle attack that can send them charging across levels to slam you in the face, dealing massive damage. Luckily for you, with the Ram Shackles, you can fight right back. Tackling a Supersoldaten in mid-charge will not only deal damage to them and negate the damage they would have dealt to you, but if you kill them, you get a nice trophy/achievement!

5. Rain Literal Fire On Enemies From Above
One of the other contraptions you get, Battle Walkers, let you march around on giant, cool looking stilts. The first advantage is that this lets you reach high places for secret areas. The other is that you tower over foes and can rain down bullets, grenades, laser blasts, and whatever else you see fit. For a particularly fun time, grab a flame-based weapon and burn them all to ash as they flee in terror.

6.  Kill Nazis...While Wearing A Corset
The last contraption, Constrictor Harness, lets B.J. constrict his torso so that he can move snake-like through small holes and ventilation shafts. Should you find a nazi ankle waiting for you at the other end, you can dish out some deliciously gory violence on it with your handy hatchet.

7. Hang Out With A Half-Cat, Half-Monkey Creature
Her name is Sosahana and she's got a better score at the gun range then you do. 

8.  Shift The Course Of History
Like in The New Order, at the beginning of The New Colossus, you make a choice that changes how the game unfolds. You'll gain access to new weapons and most cutscenes in the game will play out very differently through the campaign depending on your choice.

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THESE LAST ONES: Seriously do not read unless you don't mind having a vital story points of the game spoiled for you. Last chance to bail! Ok, here we go.

9. Set Nazis On Fire With A Giant Metal Wolf
The Panzerhund returns and this time there's one who's mighty friendly with us, letting us board him and roam the streets of New Orleans, disintegrating foes with his fire breath.

10. Brutally Dispatch Nazis While In A Wheelchair
Yep. You read that right. 

11.  Go Out Of This World
Yep. That's right. Time to put on a space suit, baby. We won't go to heavily into spoilers but suffice to say: the space level in Wolfenstein II dwarfs the moon mission in The New Order in fun factor, disturbing tone, and ambition.

12. Chop Off Your Parent's Arm
Some things therapy can't fix. 

13. Interrupt Sex In A Bathysphere
Eva's Hammer is a big boat. Sometimes love blooms between two people. Too bad they could haven't consummated said love in a more private place.... 

14. Murder A Nazi On Live Television 
That's one way to boost the ratings.

15. Literally Kill Hitler
Sure, doing so results in a quick game over but you can walk over to Hitler, stomp his face in, and get an achievement for your troubles before the laser beams cut you down.

For more on Wolfenstein II, be sure to read our review here