The lights are on
Whether it's Half-Life's well-polished single-player experience, Left 4 Dead's intense multiplayer mayhem, or the amusing puzzle-like experience that was Portal, it's hard to argue with Valve pedigree, but you can certainly try if you'd like.
"There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to. I even invited your best friend the Companion Cube. Of course he couldn't come because you murdered him. All your other friends couldn't come either because you don't have any other friends because of how unlikable you are. It says so right here in your personnel file; 'Unlikable. Liked by no one. A bitter unlikable loner whose passing shall not be mourned.' SHALL NOT BE MOURNED. That's exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official. It also says you were adopted. So that's funny too."