The lights are on
So I tend to mostly review games that I personally really enjoy. I've been reviewing games in my head since I had my PS1 and N64. I just recently discovered that I could be doing that same thing, here on gameinformer. I wanted to review a crappy game, so here it is!So the first thing you do is press R1 to pee. The toilet humor in this game becomes evident right off the bat. But hey, we all like shows like Family Guy, so maybe the crude humor will have a nice touch here and there. No, it's very overly done, making it literally impossible to take the alien invasion seriously. Right after you're done peeing, you can go pick up a piece of poo out of a toilet and throw it at the bathroom mirror. The mirror...I pressed the jump button while looking at myself in the mirror and started loosing my high hopes instantly. But I brushed it off as just a technically shortcoming and gave the game a fair chance. Maybe the combat would be really fun, you never know.But, now that I DO know, I think the combat was so seriously flawed in more ways than one. When Duke first bashes the glass case to obtain the classic pump action pistol grip shotgun, I was excited. But for a shotgun, the weapon has zero spread. I think maybe the shotgun was fire slugs, but most players obtain a shotgun thinking it's the standard buckshot and utilize it for close quarters. So I never used that again. Around the start of the game, Duke finds himself reduced in size. You randomly step on something that shrinks you. You will remain in this nerfed form for what seems like forever as you drive a toy race car around hallways and corridors that all look the same. You regain your normal size eventually, but don't worry, it happens again later. Many other of the weapons were all pretty inaccurate, underpowered, or just plain out of place. When coming across a dropped gun on the ground, I was asking myself "well, which weapon sucks the least?"The graphic visuals overall were not impressing. I think this would make a great PS2 game, but for being released during the prime of this generation of consoles, I think it was very obsolete. At least in looks. Everything in the environment felt like it looked cheap and somewhat lazy.The audio features in the game were fair. Duke's voice was very undesirable. I know that's what he use to sound like, but the gaming industry has evolved and changed greatly since Duke Nukem's last installment. For this generation, the overly confident muscle-brain tone the Duke takes is extremely out of place.The plot was a complete joke. I mean, it completely failed to hold my attention whatsoever. I felt as if I were playing a character with absolutely no motive at all. This plot appears to have had very little thought put into it.By the time my character is small again, inside a kitchen, and trying to hop onto burger patties to avoid the hot grill I realized that the only way I could enjoy this game at all was by looking at it like a comedy. A bad comedy lacking any depth. I completely lost interest throughout the game many times and actually had to force myself to just finish it through. For this, I would say the replay value of this game is extremely low. What few laughs this game has to offer quite frankly isn't worth dealing with the painful loading times between sections.
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