The tale of nothingness chapter 7: OMGITSPHIL. - The_Wampa_King Blog - www.GameInformer.com
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The tale of nothingness chapter 7: OMGITSPHIL.

The walrus king didn't know what to do. He had the walrus ball, but he had no real use for it. What was he going to do with a bunch of walruses?! He decided he was done. He covered the ball with a sheet, and left the room. Done deal. Say bye to the walruses. Story is over.

 

OR IS IT?!?!?!?

 

Just then, someone broke through the window. WHO WAS IT?! It was Dr Philrus!

He started to look around, looking for something to steal, when suddenly he spotted the ball.

His expression:

He took the ball and laughed! He would have his own army of Philruses!

Meanwhile, in CA:

The walruses were having fun; eating people, eating food, drinking beer, the usual. Suddenly, andy was someone else. A philrus! He saw some guy crying. He wen't up to him. "You're a sad person!" He said. He looked up. "Yes, I am.". "I could tell you were sad, because I have a a masters degree in experimental psychology, so I'm way smarter then you'll ever be! How does that make you feel?"

He continued to sob. "I asked you a question, maam, AND I WANT IT ANSWERED!" He continued to sob.

He became very angry, and started kicking him. "I AM THE LORD THY PHIL, AND NO ONE IGNORES ME!" he said, pulled out a alligator tail, and started whacking him with it. "Awareness without action is worthless!" He said, and continued to whack him until he died.

He walked over to some fat guy. "Get up each morning, look at yourself in the mirror, and see yourself not as someone who is overweight or out of shape, but as the someone you will become!" Said philrus. "Shut up, baldy!" said fatty.

He became very angry. He grabbed the nearest lamp post and ripped it from the ground. He whacked the man with it! "Hey man, that hurts!" said fatty. "NO ONE CALLS ME BALDY!" said phil, and continued to whack him.  "THE MOST YOU GET IS WHAT YOU ASK FOR, AND YOU'VE BEEN ASKING FOR A GOOD BEATING!" he said and killed him on the spot. He went on giving people 'advice' on how to live life, even though none were living after they met him.

 

BACK IN THE LAIR:

The walrus king heard something. He went into his living room, pig leg in hand, and peeked around the wall. It was a philrus! And it was raiding his fridge! "What you doing in mah house/lair thing?!?!" said the king. Philrus looked up, and replied: "You cannot be who and what you are unless you have a lifestyle, both internally and externally, that is designed to support that definition of self."

They stood staring at each other for a few seconds, until uncle ben came flying in a super suit through the window! "With great  fridges come great responsibility!" he said, and started raiding his fridge also. Walrus king didn't know what to do. He decided to eat. Why not? He could always use friends.

Whats next? I DUNO!

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