Don’t Make Out In The Woods, Especially With A Killer On The Loose… - subsaint Blog - www.GameInformer.com
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Don’t Make Out In The Woods, Especially With A Killer On The Loose…

I don't know about you but when I watch scary movies I always yell at the victims for the stupid choices they make that inevitably lead their untimely demise. I think this is common place, but of course I'm not sitting there on the couch next to you when you're watching movies so I can't say for certain.

Perhaps the worst of these poor choices is when the victim thinks they have mortally wounded the perpetrator, so they turn their back on them...and when they look up again the bad guys is either gone...or worse...standing over them ready to sock them in the kisser.

Sadly, many of our video game characters (and non-player characters) make many of the same ill-fated decisions. What seems like common sense to you and me must be missing from the lines of code that breathe life into our Artificial Intelligence adversaries.

Your standard every day guard is typically the worst offender. Can you believe these hired guns are on the payroll to serve and protect, yet you can flip a light switch off in the room they're in and they are more inclined to believe something inexplicably went wrong with the lights than they are an elite soldier (usually this is you) is sneaking around in the shadows about to do them harm. These are the same guards who usually have radios but never think to call dispatch when they find something out of order or when they need back up. I guess that's to be expected when they fall asleep or take a cigarette break every few minutes.

It's not just the guards though. I'm telling you, if I was ever in a game where I was a Goomba, I think I would vary my movements, if even just a little bit. You know how hard it is to jump on a Goomba? It's not hard at all. And why isn't it hard at all? Because they never seem to vary their movements. They take a set path which is pretty easy for Mario and his cronies to observe the pattern before making their moves. Imagine Mario preparing to jump on a Goomba with random pathing forcing you to stay on your toes and time your jump...or at least think about it a little. I would want to be a Goomba like that.

I'm not a huge fan of Grand Theft Auto (I think they are great games, just not something I've ever been interested in), but I've watched enough of them to know one of the most common practices is jacking cars. I mean, the name is Grand Theft Auto...so what did you expect you would be doing. I've watched people play the game, and others like it, and stealing cars seems fairly easy.

Approach car.

Stand in front of car. Car stops. Pull person from car. Get in car. Drive off.

Voila, you have a new car.

But let's think about this for a second. If you saw someone you didn't know waving a gun in the air and flagging you down...would you just stop and let them take your car? I think not. If you stop - you die. I would run them over or I would flip the car around and head in the opposite direction. Nope, not our computer AI...let me stop and get out of the car. You can have it. Here, take it.

I could go probably list a few more examples if I thought about it a bit longer, but it's already late and my Titanfall is ready. There are minions to eliminate. Ah, minions. Why do they run towards a titan that towers above them and is mostly unaffected by the pea shooters most of the minions carry? I dunno. That's about as wise as camping at Camp Crystal Lake and sneaking out after dark to go make out in the woods. It never ends well. Minions beware.

Cheers.               

 

 

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