The lights are on
Veteran Member - Level 11
For some inexplicable reason I actually chose to sit down
and watch the newest Resident Evil movie tonight. Perhaps it's the cold front sweeping
across the East coast freezing my brain, or maybe it's because I've been reading
Kate Willaert's daily blogs for the past few weeks as she covers a different video
game themed movie each day for her 31/31 blog challenge. I'm not really a fan
of the Resident Evil series, so I have no earthly idea what compelled me to try
and endure such a hot mess. And a hot mess it is.
Alice awakes at home
with her daughter Becky and her husband. But soon she realizes that she is
actually in an Umbrella Corporation's underground facility. Out of the blue,
the computer security system shuts-down and Alice flees to the central control
room of the facility. She meets Ada Wong, who works with Albert Wesker, and she
learns that a five-man team has been sent by Wesker to rescue them. However,
the Red Queen sends Jill Valentine and Rain to hunt them down.
The Resident Evil series has spawned nearly 2 dozen video
games and almost a half a dozen movies. I had no idea there were so many.
With the exception of maybe Alone in the Dark, the original
Resident Evil is the first horror game I ever played that actually made me jump
out of my skin. It's also one of the only games I've played that kept me on the
edge of my seat while I played it. I think about the game now and remember how
frustrated I should've been playing the game - the camera wasn't the greatest,
the controls were clunky and the voice acting was...well, if you played the game you
know how it was. Talk of Jill Sandwiches and being the master of unlocking come
to mind. Despite its flaws, Resident Evil was still an enjoyable game with many
I will never forget the first time you see that figure
hunched over a body on the ground...making awful munching sounds, and as you
approach, this pale and sickly looking shell of a man turns his head to look at
you as you approach. Only, he wasn't a man...he was anything but.
I will never forget walking by a dead body only to have it reach
out and grab me by the leg or opening a door and discovering a zombie standing right
there in front of you, shifting along trying to grab you.
And those dogs, who could forget those zombie dogs, jumping
through the window causing you to nearly soil your pants?
I might complain about the game now, but back in 1996 as I
played the first one on my brand new Playstation, I thought it was simply...amazing.
Fast forward to present day and my feeble attempt at trying
to watch Resident Evil: Retribution. It didn't go well. I fell asleep about
half way through. I guess what shocked me the most (besides the bad acting) was
all of the original characters were still present - characters like Barry, Wesker,
Jill Valentine and Ada Wong...but apparently a lot has happened to them over the
years, in the different games and movies.
I tried to watch the movie with an open mind, even though I
don't know the Resident Evil history or timeline of events; I was going in somewhat
blind. Some of the action sequences and fight scenes were spectacular and entertaining,
but these were few and far in between. The story was convoluted at best, and I
never even knew what was going on, at least right up to the point where I dozed
off. I'll take the blame for that though, since I haven't played any of the
There was one part that I did find humorous, and whether it
was accidental or a tribute to Smash TV, I don't know...but at one point Alice
tells Albert Wesker she is going to kill him and he responds with:
The way he was framed by the monitor screen and the tone he
used really made me think it was a tribute to this classic game, but I can't say
Milla Jovovich's performance as Alice was adequate, but
whoever the actress is that played Jill Valentine was painful to watch. It's
almost as if she watched and listened to Jill Valentine in the original game as
her inspiration on how to portray the character. I was annoyed every time she
talked...and even the way she fired her guns. I cringe even thinking about it now.
When the best thing you can say about a movie is it upholds
the trend that video game movies suck, I think falling asleep in the middle of
it is justified.
Avoid this one like a zombie infected family member.