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Veteran Member - Level 11
I'm in love with an inanimate object. I suppose the more I
think about it, the more ridiculous that sounds - inanimate objects in video
games, especially when you consider inanimate objects are those items with no living
parts, so technically video games are inanimate objects, no?
But for the sake of this blog, consider this statement to
mean the inanimate objects found internal to the game, with the assumption the
characters possess living parts even though they're nothing more than 3D models
coded to perform certain functions. Ah, the heck with it. Let me illustrate
what I mean by sharing an example using a well-liked character from each of the
popular gaming platforms.
Gordon Freeman is a scientist, but his crowbar is an
Kratos is the god of war, but his double chained blades are
an inanimate object. I was going to use Sackboy as an example, but couldn't decide
whether he was one or not - does he have living parts?
Marcus Fenix, the hulk of a soldier that he is, is not an
inanimate object, but his bandana sure is.
Mario is a plumber, Yoshi is a dinosaur (or dragon,
depending on what you read), so they're both living things, but stars, flowers
and 1Ups are inanimate objects. It does beg the question, when Mario uses the
Tanooki Suit to turn into a statue, is he then an inanimate object? Gosh, this
is getting harder instead of easier but at least I've clarified what I'm
talking about, I hope.
I feel like I've
talked about this subject before, and given I've been here a few years now and
posted a couple of blogs before, it's quite possible. But if I did, most of
these are new examples, so just consider this a revision. I'm going to start
out with an easy one so you can see where I'm going with this.
MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD - BEWARE.
Halo: My Partner
- If you've played Halo, you obviously know who Cortana is, and if you haven't,
you probably still know who she is. But if you don't, Cortana is an artificial
intelligence (A.I.) assigned to Spartan 117, also known as the Masterchief.
Artificial intelligence serial number CTN 0452-9, was a "Smart" AI
construct, or "Intelligent Agent". She was one of the most important
figures in the Human-Covenant war, and served as John-117's partner in various
combat missions as well as serving as the A.I. for the United Nations Space
Command Halcyon-class light cruiser UNSC Pillar of Autumn and the Orbital
Defense Platform Cairo Station. In addition, she held vital data pertaining to
the Halos, including the Activation Index from Installation 04. -Halo Wikia
Cortana, she is the projected image of an A.I. who takes on
the appearance of a young attractive woman, but technically, that's all she is
- an image. If that is true, then why do I care what happens to her? She has no
living parts; she was created in the image of Dr. Halsey, yet I can't help but
view her as a teammate, and dare I say...friend. Throughout the series, she's
been there and in the latest installment of Halo, the relationship between her
and the Masterchief is tested to the breaking point more than it's ever been in
previous episodes resulting in a turn of events sure to hit you in the chest
like a gravity hammer.
Mass Effect 3: My
Well, if we're talking about affection towards an inanimate
object and computer A.I., no discussion would be complete without mentioning
EDI from Mass Effect 3. She's the provocative and powerful artificial
intelligence that used to assist with running the Normandy, but after events
occur in the game she becomes something far more significant.
The Enhanced Defense
Intelligence or EDI is an AI created by Cerberus and installed aboard the
Normandy SR-2. She is/was represented visually by a holographic blue sphere and
aurally with a feminine voice at various terminals throughout the ship where
she can provide basic information about the Normandy and Cerberus. While
investigating Prothean technology on Mars, Shepard's team recovers a Cerberus
synthetic, an android masquerading as "Dr. Eva Coré". EDI assists in
extracting vital data from the unit, and in the process, she seizes control of
the body. This allows her to serve as a squadmate on missions.-Mass Effect 3 Wikia
If you've played Mass Effect, you know as well as I do some
of your decisions can result in the loss of a character. This has a profound
effect when you review your staff roster before picking teammates to deploy on potentially
dangerous missions. It's a double edged sword, because you want to bring along
the characters you like, but you don't want to lose them. EDI was always a
keeper for me, but I still took her along much of the time. For the first time
in the series, EDI takes a human like shape when she embeds herself in a
recovered Cerberus synthetic defeated by Shepard. Even though she wasn't a love
interest, I still didn't want anything bad to happen to her.
Dead Space: My Girl
This is perhaps the most tragic example of attachment to an
inanimate object, and if you played the game you certainly know why.
Prior to her
attachment to the USG Ishimura, Nicole lived with her boyfriend, Isaac Clarke.
She was uncertain of her future career aboard the Ishimura at first, but
changed her mind when encouraged to take the job by Isaac. -Dead Space Wikia
Isaac Clarke, the character you play in Dead Space, arrives
on the Ishimura to render assistance but one can't help but wonder if he is
really there to locate and rescue his girlfriend Nicole. Along the way, Isaac
finds transmissions hinting of her whereabouts. You get to the point where
you're longing to find the next one of these clues, and eventually you find the
one that explains all of the events as they transpired. It's like people that
archive voicemails from friends or family and revisit them from time to time to
remember them. There is an epic and tragic twist, resulting in that final video
log being a bittersweet inanimate object I hold near and dear to my heart. More
bitter than sweet.
Okay, so one could argue any affinity for the above examples
of inanimate objects don't count because they are essentially characters, just
not "living" characters. A fair point. But I'm not done yet.
Borderlands 2: My Guns
I only played BL2 a short time but I realized right away,
there are a ton of guns...and if you don't get to the gun crates before your
teammates, you're going to get their leftovers. Players seem pretty attached to
the weapons they find, myself included. I accidentally dropped one of my prized
possessions and picked up some piece of garbage, but I didn't realize it until
much later and I was butt hurt about it for hours after the fact that I lost this
The Uncharted series is my favorite or second favorite video
game series ever, and I was both happy and disappointed when they revealed the
history and fate of the ring you see Nathan Drake wear around his neck. I, and
others I would presume, liken it to the Fedora worn by Indiana Jones, which he
nearly loses in every movie but manages to recover at the last second. If
you've ever watched the Young Indiana Jones series, you know the fascinating
tale how he acquired the hat. As far as Nathan Drake's ring though, the mystery
is explained but the outcome is eventually rendered irrelevant. Pity, I loved
Minecraft: My Stuff
Realistically speaking, there are only a few things that
pose a danger to your possessions and structures in Minecraft. Creepers, others
players and yourself. Just last night I was playing and my carelessness
resulted in a creeper blowing the face off of my newly constructed house. All
the windows were destroyed and there was a crater 3 blocks deep where my foyer
used to be. I can't be mad because it was inattention on my part. I put myself
in a bad position. A few nights ago while digging deep into a mountain under
low level torchlight I accidently dug through the block I was standing on and
plummeted to my death. Everything I was carrying, gone (I managed to get back
to the location but was overcome by skeletons before I could pick my stuff up). I
wasn't too broken hearted over that either. But when I really turn into a cry
baby is when my son trespasses onto my property. I have built up walls, dug
moats, posted signs and punched him in the arm repeatedly to stay off my
property. In my defense, on more than one occasion, he has battled creepers on
my property resulting in heavy damages when things don't go according to plan.
I love my stuff in Minecraft, so stay back. Yes, I know it's just a game and
yes I know a minecart is an inanimate
object...but it's still mine, so leave it the F alone!
Privateer: My Ship
Privateer is an older game from the Wing Commander series. A
fantastic game that lets you build spaceships and take on the life of a space
cowboy who hauls cargo or transports people...OR be a bounty hunter, smuggler or
pirate. You get to customize your ship with weapons, armor, electronics
packages and other pieces and parts. In one particular skirmish with some
unruly pirates my ship was getting battered and I decided to flee so I could
live to fight another day. I was having problems coming up to speed as my
shields flickered and the layers of armor were being peeled away. "Why am I not
moving?" And then I saw it out my cockpit viewport - my afterburner unit was
floating away in hyperspace...and there was nothing I could do about it. Nobody
destroys my ship that I've invested numerous hours and tons of money to
upgrade. I did what any of you would've done if you were in my shoes. No, not
eject and surrender...I reloaded my last saved game file.
Portal: My Toys
Ah Portal...you cruel, cruel game. I know I've talked about
this particular inanimate object in previous blogs, but how Valve got me to
feel sympathy over a cube is unexplainable, unbelievable and downright unfair.
It's...a cube. A block. A means to an end. A way to get from point A to point B.
It provided nothing substantial - not friendship, not love, not shelter, not
food, not a way to escape...nothing. Nothing except for companionship; and since
it was appropriately labeled the companion cube, perhaps that's all I needed it
And there you have it. A handful of games I like and items
from them I value as treasure. There are certainly tons of others - hats from
Team Fortress 2 and Dog from Half Life and my Power Ranger suit from Crysis. I
know I'm not the only one out there who gets attached to inanimate objects, so
how about some of you brave souls share items from your favorite games that you've
gotten attached to.