I'm not the biggest Alien fan in the world, but some of my first nightmares are thanks to my parents for letting me watch the movie when I was only 4. Also, for most of my childhood, my toy collection was dominated by Xenomorphs. I've seen all the movies, even endured the AVP films all the way to their abysmal conclusions. I would call myself a solid fan.


So, when I heard the initial grumblings that Ridley Scott had fumbled Prometheus, I believed it wholly... Until I watched it.


I'm not going to blow smoke up your bum, it's not the most amazing movie ever made, but it's pretty damn good, honestly. In fact, I walked away with not even a hint of understanding as to why it was so fan hated. Not even a little.


My initial hypothesis was AVP fans pissed that this prequel negated that series' fiction. Which seemed like the most ridiculous thing ever to me. Prometheus is bad because it failed to recognize the lore of an action figure selling marketing stint? Dear lord.

However, upon deeper inspection, it turns out Prometheus' antifans reasonings can't hope to be so sane and understandable.

Here's the first thing I found in my hunt for an explanation.


A list of complaints.

1. When the question is finally asked in the ending, why were humans created etc, The "alien" answers by breaking the androids neck and riping its head off. I can`t imagine a much bigger antiklimax, ever, in the history of movies. If you ask big existential and universal questions in a movie that was suppose to be the epic movie of this decade, You better have a effin answers, otherwise- Dont ask them. You will dissapoint people greatly. Do not, instead of a simple or logic answer put in "Uhh ..we dont have a answer for that..so ok, what if the big guy rips his head off, that be cool?", NO.

2. The original creature with his chest popped open was way, way bigger in the first movie. And it didnt even die where it was suppose too, it the cockpit chair. Look at those half see-through-white gotish style- blackeyed half-ass aliens running around.What are they about?.... Do we care? The original Exoskeleton was so much better and I shouldnt even have to explain why. Maybe people wants to see cool aliens, true to the original idea, and not half-ass ones.

3. Why would any species leave an "invitation" to their biowarfare factory planet? expecially to the ones they seem to hate the most? maybe, they are not very bright, must be all that black goo.

4. What was the black goo anyway? Some got mutated, some got pregnant, and some just got their face melted away in a cave while his buddy played pikaboo with some sort of snake,...who looked like a crossbreed between a *** and a vagina, A Pegina.

5.You don`t get up and run after a C-section, you would bleed to death. C-sections needs pressure to stop bleeding. I dont care how much staples you use.

6. Noomi will never be Ripley, ok? same haircut is not going to do the trick.That just aint going to happen, like somebody said "There aint no facepalm big enough".Ripley had character, one that you bought as "the real deal" on top of that.No character in this movie had any credibility, and on top of that -they were amateurs, and if they werent, they sure knew how to behave like one.

7.How in the world of Zeus, did Noomi figure out that is was a bioweapon that was going to be used against earth? because of the starmap?? that just didnt make any effin sence- at all!!
She went from "It is an invition" to "They want to kill us" based on what??

8. Nowhere, ever, was there an explanation for why the android put black goo in that guys champagne. Seemed like a good idea at the time? spare of the moment thing? syntax error?

9. What was the point with Weyland being alive? there was no twist to the story? what did it change? nothing! neither did it add anything to the story that Theron was his daughter. zzzZZZzzzZZZ

10. Weylands makeup was horrible bad...

11. If I were to sumon up the message of the movie it would be this- It is better to believe in god and play around in the little pond then to explore the universe looking for the origin and reason of humankind. (Beacuse you will just get your head ripped off, so what else is new?)

12. .....Who runs ahead of a crashing ship rather then away from it? ......

13. What was up with that guy in the first scene? and what happened to the ship leaving the atmosphere? who knows....and who still cares?so many questions, so few answers.

14. All aliens were non cool and ugly, just plain ugly doesnt equal cool sci-fi.


Sorry that was so long, I felt I should feature this unedited.



My first reaction to this, was I thought it was a Prometheus fan trolling people who didn't like the film, by pretending to be one and acting the fool. I mean, after all, his complaints are so silly and mundane, so nitpicky, I couldn't believe these could be the actual reasons! But I was wrong. The more I searched, the more of this bullcrap I trudged through. Prometheus is bad because blah blah blah, whine whine whine.

They used the wrong camera's, it should have been in SD like the original Alien movies!

The ship should be a different color! It should be white! How do they avoid traffic accidents in space if it doesn't stand out?

None of the scenes show a toilet, are we expected to believe these humans don't need to crap and urinate?

That one guy was wearing glasses! Everyone will have Lasik in the future!

My television screen was dirty! How could Ridley Scott let this happen?

I made these ones up btw, did you notice? I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't, cause they seem just as legitimate to me as the real complaints. I mean, name me the movie that is immune to nitpicking everything little thing like an obnoxious ocd patient?

Let's see, I'll give it a shot.

Jurrassic Park: you can't get dna from fossilized amber, the dna still decomposes. Velociraptors are actually really small. There, now that movie is terrible too.

Terminator 2; They couldn't get the original actress back for Sarah Conner. Also, the liquid metal terminator shouldn't have made it through the time machine because it was stated that only things covered in flesh could make it through. Hope you weren't a fan of that, cause it's shite now too.

Star Wars; Parsec is a measurement of space, not time. Hope you can find a new franchise to base your mmo's on, EA.

Starting to get it?

Eh... I'm trying to understand. A long awaited film, obviously, expectations were sky high. But, by any stretch of the imagination, Prometheus is not a bad movie at all. Great character performances, great special effects, solid writing, and decent plot. By all rights, this movie is at least okay to slightly good, no matter how fanatic you are. Right? I will state this, it's not a game changer like the original Alien movies were. I can see that, but I can't imagine everybody was dead convinced this would usurp, or even match those classics.

Haters of Prometheus, I call on you to find your common sense. You're acting crazy, man...