Switch Lights

The lights are on

What's Happening

Am I a Girl [Woman] Gamer? More Like A Gamer Who Happens To Be Female....

Gaming-it's not just for rage-filled sunflowers!

Many people ask me, "Oni? You're a girl gamer, right?  Why not tell me about X, from the point of view of a girl!"

To that, I must say, that it's really not a question that I can answer.  Most of us who identify as gamers identify as different types of gamers.  One person might enjoy console games, while another prefers handhelds.  And another person might prefer the choices and dialogue trees from RPGs while another prefers the flying explosions and frag-fest in a FPS.  

And of course, there are plenty of people who like multiple genres, consoles and gameplay mechanisms.  I think that most of us would agree that gaming shouldn't be relegated to only specific races or genders of people.

DSlite-Tan is so cute in her several color schemes!

For some reason, people keep singling out female gamers as though they are a concrete group hive-mind.  When someone says "this game is for girls," a lot of the time, they seem to think that women will play the game for some estrogen-based reason, and not because the game is, say, actually good or fun.

For example, plenty of women play the most popular mainstream games that are often considered "for guys".  Although, many of them will stay off of the mics during multiplayer for exactly this reason.  You can't believe how many times I've watched my male friends playing Halo and then some girl starts talking on her headset and suddenly a huge number of the guys go "GIRL!?" "GIRL?!"

It's like those seagulls in "Finding Nemo."  With about the same results...

Obviously, not all gamers are like this, but if you've played rounds with people  on multiplayer (although, obviously, it's more of an XBOX thing since most people have headsets), this is actually semi-common.  Also similar is the number of female gamers who will use their female-ness (or guys pretending to be girls) to try and get people to give them stuff for free in MMO's.  Honestly, I find this kind of...distasteful..but it's their stuff, so I guess they can give it away if they really want to.

PS3-Tan has big....tracts of land?

Which brings me to my next point-the idea of female gamers as "rare".  When I first started gaming, the main reason I was doing it was, well, because I enjoyed it.  I loved playing Mario, I loved zooming Sonic (or flying Tails) through a level.  I loved shooting light beams out of the Master Sword in Legend of Zelda.  It didn't occur to me that I should be upset because Mario was a guy rescuing a helpless (female) princess.  Or that Link was male so I should be all annoyed that there was no female character to play as. 

To my brain, as far as I was concerned, most male gamers don't look like either Link OR Mario, yet they had a perfectly fine time playing as those characters.  And even today, I still kind of see things this way.  While I do often play as a female character if given the chance (female characters get the cute outfits anyway), I don't really care what the gender of the character is, as long as the game has tight, responsive controls, fairly good graphics and a story/gameplay mechanic that I enjoy.  Other than that, the rest is just irrelevant to me.

PSP-Tan, although stripped down and scantily-clad, still has all the essential areas covered.

When I started hitting adolescence, (and subsequently my hormones decided to make me boy-crazy), I became really self-conscious about my gaming.  Obviously, when I was alone at home, gaming wasn't embarrassing, but I was so afraid that someone would peg me as some undesirable or worse, a freak, if I confessed to liking video games.  Many girls already thought I was weird and strange (but then again, I had a big old rag-tag group of other weird and interesting people to hang out with, so it wasn't that bad), so I was loath to give them another reason to completely ostracize me.

But as I grew older, I noticed that I tended to get crushes on either guys who looked kind of geeky or guys from the skateboarding/surfing crowd.  And many of these guys were into games.  So I started looking at gaming from the point of view of a girl-who-wants-to-impress-a-guy-because-zomg-he-is-cute.  So I hid the fact that I enjoyed gaming because I didn't want to look like a know-it-all.  Besides, this way when they got all excited about explaining a game to me, I wouldn't smash their excitement all over the ground by replying, "Oh yeah, I totally know ALL about that and beat it myself only a couple days ago!"  In my imagination, this would send any guy (even if said guy loved gaming) running for the hills.  Of course, now I know that a lot of guys actually like when girls play games, but back then, I didn't really know, and felt that I was already counter-culture enough by not wanting to wear make-up and pretty much permanently wearing jeans and a t-shirt (to cover my large breasts) because back then, the popular female body type among the guys was super thin with smallish boobs.

This is kind of where I started liking anime, too.  FInally there were women who had huge boobs just like me, who didn't look all frumpy and awful.  "Woo!" I thought, "Maybe there was some hope for me, contrary to all the horrible things that my mom says about me dying alone with a million cats because I'm too smart and act like a guy!"

But eventually, I did come out of the closet when it comes to gaming and geeky types of things, and I was pleasantly surprised in most instances.

Wii tan is cute, but one wonders what will happen when you take the nunchuck off her head...

First of all, I learned that, yes, other female people also enjoy games.  Of course, this in no way means that said women and I will get along or even like each other as individuals, but needless to say, I do have geeky (and not so geeky) female friends who still play video games.  Even my best friend Sara totally squeed when I got her a GBA Micro with Super Mario Land 3.  She's not really into gaming all that much as an adult, but she still loves herself some Mario.

Secondly, I realized that enjoying games as a woman was not really all that different from enjoying games as a guy.  I always had this feeling like guys "owned" gaming more so than I ever could, mainly because it seemed like 99% of the marketing and clothing items with video game themes were for guys (well, maybe except for the Barbie Tiger Video Game, back in the day when they made those crappy 20 dollar systems that only played one game).

I actually owned this very system.  Oh those were the days.....

And finally, I realized that a lot of people don't care either way when they find out that you are into video games.  I originally had this idea that people would react strongly to finding out my "dirty little gamer secret"-either cringe and shriek, running away like I had the plague or immediately get big hearts popping out of their eyes and a boa constrictor hug screaming "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE PERFECT LADY?!" but most of the time, people don't really care.  Usually it's one of those, "you like that too, cool!" sorts of conversation starters, but if it isn't pursued much further than that, there really isn't much more to say.

iPhone-tan is sophisticated and cute!

Being a female gamer isn't something that you ARE as much as it's something that you happen to be.  I mean, there are Christian gamers and Black Gamers and Left Handed gamers, but most of the time, these "categories" are little more than red herrings when applied to the multi-faceted likes and dislikes of the individual gamer.  

And really, that's the beauty of gaming.  Even though we all come from different origins and have different stories to tell of who we are and what we love about life, we still all can agree that gaming is a pretty awesome pastime and that regardless of what we may look like or what our genetics say we are, gaming is something we're not going to give up, no how no way!

So yes, I am a female and I am a gamer, and I'm proud to be both!

**************************

So what are your thoughts about your gaming habits and your gender?  Do you think that being male/female/othergendered shaped how you enjoy your gaming experience?

Comments
  • Othergendered? LMAO Well, my opinion is that if someone start to act weird once a "female" joins the group in a game, that's close to racism. Or "gender-ism". But reading this blog post I remember you have written something similar before. Now because you have obviously played so many games already, I would love to have you as a girlfriend (would you be a bit younger and live closer :P). That is because, I love to have conversations about games in detail with other people, preferably when the other side has also played through the games for the most part or actually completed them. Currently I have only 2 friends who I talk to about such stuff regularly. Well, I've never really hidden my love in video games, because I am a weird person and I've been for a long time, so I know I don't really belong to the "normal" society. All the people at school knew I loved video games, all my current coursemates and most of my friends and my family knows. Video games is the source where I've learned most my "excellent" English by the way. And well, as you said that some people prefer multi-platform gaming and others stay with one particular platform, I prefer PC-gaming to everything else. I cannot even imagine how hard it would be to play Battlefield 1942 on PS3 or XBOX360. I cannot understand how can you hit someone when he moves away from you. Auto-targeting? Blah, that's just absurd and ridiculously boring. I have my gamepad which I use to play a few games, like Tony Hawks Pro Skater 4, cause to tell you the truth - games that are made for consoles and then ported to PC, they are usually played best with a gamepad or joystick. And I have one, very powerful with lots of well-placed buttons. And Oni, I think you know what I want to say right now, so I'm not gonna say it!
  • Well honestly being a female gamer has helped me improve in the insult department. Because I am 16 and a girl and let me tell you I hate hate hate when once I speak I either get the super rude guys who keep asking the most sexual questions ever, which leads me to remark to them if they were really that unattractive that they had to somehow get some type of xbox live "ass" because thats all they were going to get. than their are the really rude guys who simply point you out and kill you. like they have a vendetta against me. why, once i even had a guy,on my team, track me down and kill me the whole way through. I remember when i was about 8 or so and i had first started gaming online on our PC, I played cod:allied assault, a grown man literally kept posting spam about me and i was 8!!!! but thats not to say all guys are rude like you pointed out i have met some very good people on there that are so cool and just down to earth. and those are really the true gamers i appreciate cause they dont discriminate against you its just all about the good and fun of the game thats it, and thats all it should ever be, by the way amazing blog and i so agree the female characters get such cute outfits!!!
  • I actually got to use Portal 2 as a conversation starter with two girls I met last week. They had both played and beaten Portal 2 and loved it. There's something we had in common- gaming.
  • i'm a multicultural christian gamer :) and other male gamers(not myself) overexagerate the fact that there is a girl playing on PSN. And honestly, if you are of some Asian decent, I don't think you should own an XBOX. I know some people that are Asian play on XBOX Live, and I think it's just sad. But that's just me.
  • Oni, you can't go around talking about your large breasts and posting pictures like those. You're liable to inspire thoughts of a prurient nature in your readers.
  • By far one of the most well written blogs written in awhile. I am a guy, but honestly I don't care if a girl plays video games. If a girl happens to like the same kind of hobby as I do more power to them. I actually find that girls are rereshing to hear or talk to about games. I honestly get sick and tired of some of my male friends who talk about hot girls and talking smack about everything(not saying girls wont do that either) but I would actually like to hear things from a female's perspective than a males. Again I say this blog is well writtenn and somewhat though provoking.
  • It really doesn't matter to me...although you might get mad and that's fine, if you do, I'm just being honest with how I feel here, and I'm not saying what I'm about to say applies to you... I find many girls who are into gaming to be fairly immature. It's just how I feel. I'm sure there are plenty who are mature, professionally oriented people, as there are some who work here on the site. But to me when a I see a female gamer, and perhaps it's as you said they are afraid to let those colors show outside a small circle, I tend to see girls dressed up in ear hats, and discussing cartoons and other things that just don't seem appropriate for their age. You could say I'm old I'm 27 but most times when I meet a female gamer, and I want to discuss things like religion, politics, and other current events, they tend to look at me blankly and try to steer the conversation back. I'm a gamer, but if I live in this culture 24/7 I'll miss out on too much in the world that matters. It also doesn't matter to me if a girl likes games, although I'm super competitive and can play dirty, which usually ends up with my girlfriend at the time being quite mad...but that's me... I didn't mean to offend anyone with my comments, it's just a trend I'm noticing in female gamers around my area. They tend to go the extreme with their hobby, and to me it comes off immature. I'm aware of the fact that this is just my experience, but to me that's all I can go on.
  • I'm a female gamer myself and I've always hidden the fact that I played video games from people because my peers and family had me under the impression that video games were for boys and I should be ashamed of myself for playing them. Now, I'm proud to be a gamer.Thanks.BTW, those anime drawings are SO cute. I draw anime too and drew an XBox 360 outfit, but those Tan drawing are so much cuter ^^.
  • Girls writing about playing video games?  This has got to be taboo.  Let's make a law right now prohibiting such behavior!

    I will say I usually don't use a mic either and I mute most people, due to the lack of quality conversations on XBL.  :)  

    Nice blog.  Informative!  Now off to the convent with you!

  • Hey nice blog, I have some girl friends who play games and usually they can beat the crap out of me, so good job to you :)

  • Well I met a couple female gamers in Uncharted 2 online. They seemed nice until my team beat them. They started complaining like crazy.... "You got in cover to much!!" My team just left the lobby after their complaints. Oh and Im a nocturnal male gamer. I love playing at night time. Great blog :D

  • Very good blog. And you are completely right too. Guys shouldn't think that girls know nothing of games. I also wonder about the othergendered thing though.
  • Wow good blog.

  • It's funny because When I was playing Killzone 2 semi-competitively and was active in the community we would have guys vs girls game nights.  That was awesome because all the people that would join the game were super cool and there was just about even numbers between the guys side and the girls side.  I think though that there are probably more communities like that around (though I only know of that one unfortunately) the issue is you have to look for them.  

    That being said a lot of guys are really really douchy about it and honestly it is ridiculous.  Shame too because everyone should be able to chat freely about games in games.  Guess morons have to be somewhere though.  

  • Wow this has got to be my favorite blog post since I've started reading GIO blogs, really good job. It was like reading my life before coming out of that "geek closet." I wish I can say more but you pretty much got everything - spot on. Couldn't stop laughing at some bits and I was like "Exactly!"

    *Solstice approves +10*

  • I just have to say... HA! I had that stupid Lion King pocket system as well... oh dear.
  • Interesting blog and well written. I am female and have been a gamer since the Atari days...I also collect comic books. I am now 30 and love playing co-op games with my husband. Our favorite games include Bordlands, Gears of War 2 as well as Civilization on the PC. As a female gamer, growing up, I tended to hang out with the guys more just because I could have more conversations with them than with the girls my age. I think there have always been female gamers out there,but they tend to stay quiet. As far as stereotypical game genre for females, I do not think it exists. I can enjoy a RPG game like Oblivion, but also enjoy a FPS game like Call of Duty: Black Ops. I am also a huge Gears of War fan. I also do not always play the female character if one exists. I believe the best match up in Borderlands co-op is the sniper and soldier.
  • Firstly, if people made you feel ostracized because you had big boobs, i pitty those fools for having such perverse tastes as small breasted women! Secondly, it's great to hear about this sort of thing from a girl[woman] gamer, honestly I've never met anyone i would call a girl gamer and it's both informative and refreshing to hear about it from the 'other side of the fence' sort of thing. My buds and i always jokingly say "OMG A GIRL" whenever we hear a girl on the other end of the mic, we stop with just that one line about the gamer being a girl. We do it more or less as a greeting, never really thought about it as so annoying that girls would not play with their mic until today. I still have my finger's crossed i'll meet Morgan Webb over Live. ^^ here's hoping!
  • I've always hated guys who act different as soon a girl gets on mic. I always go by this rule: No girls on the internet and children are actually the FBI. Therefore I treat everyone equally and half the time I can't tell if it's a little boy who hasn't hit puberty or a girl,so who cares. As long they're paying games. I cant stand Ps Home for this very reason, (Although it is fun to troll the white knights on it *warning* it will result in a 2 week ban lol)

    It's ashame to see the way some gamers react to girls and I believe that their reactions contribute as why there is such a small population of female gamers. That's not including the REAL female gamers. There's "fake" ones that only play COD to get attention from males at school and those that never get off Ps home. Regardless gaming is gaming, whatever the intent is /rant

1 2 Next