The lights are on
Veteran Member - Level 12
"I can haz GAMING AND ADULTHOOD @ teh saem taeim?"
I am in my mid-20's, and unlike most of my friends who are still doing post-grad or living at home with the 'rents while trying to get a job or a doing an internship, I have a husband and a child and a job that actually is full time and has benefits (I know, rare, right? Well let's see how much longer it exists thanks to budget cuts).
So, to some extent, there's this expectation on me to be "an adult."
When I turned 18 and then 21, there were clear expectations from others. I was supposed to smoke a cigarette, drink some beer, buy a scratcher or two from 7-11. Eventually, I gained more responsibility when I got married and then got pregnant and had a baby. Now that I'm a mom, there's this weird expectation to become this completely different person, as though I am supposed to start having orgasms every time it's time to do the taxes or give a standing ovation to the nightly news and throw the comics section of the newspaper to the ground in lieu of the business section.
Not only this, but even around other moms, I'm supposed to want to go off to the spa and buy uncomfortable shoes and go to the mall (ugh, maybe if it's Gamestop it'd be fine with me, but clothes shopping is the WORST). I guess that one reason I don't have many other "mom friends" is because we really don't have anything in common. They all took the "mom kool-aid" and are all about fashion and soap operas, and I'm still geeky and creative and different.
The way that I interact with my daughter is a bit different than the way that other moms interact with their children. When I am around other moms and their kids, they treat them like they're getting in the way of enjoying life, like they didn't really understand what they were signing up for when they got pregnant. I absolutely love my daughter and we have a lot of fun together. We love to go walking and while I have clear expectations for her to behave in public, I don't treat her like I feel like I'm wasting my time, which bothers me when I see other moms basically giving the "oh god, I'd rather be getting my nails done" look.
Now, this isn't all moms, but I've generally noticed that other women who game and are in relationships tend to be child-free or otherwise do not care to have children. Many more women who are married to gamers are still into all "that girly stuff" and basically see the gaming as just an extension of the stereotypical beer-bellied Homer Simpson watching TV and being generally useless, (IE: completely expected behavior).
To some extent, as long as a man has a job, he's not expected to "grow up" in any other ways. But there's this whole weird Stepford Wife Mode that women are expected (and build themselves up into) to become, so they're shoe-horned into sinking tons of money into stupid make up and name brand purses.
And this brings me to another thought-why isn't gaming allowed to be something a mature adult can play? I mean, a good number of games coming out today are rated M for Mature, but for some reason, I am guessing that the majority of those buying these games aren't over 50 years old. In fact, the majority of those who buy M titles are from the ages of 17 to 21. And if you've ever met any 17 to 21 year olds, you'll probably agree that a good number of them are not what you might consider "mature."
So yeah, I've found it hard to make friends with other female gamers my age, and generally the children of the moms I know are more fun to talk games with than the moms themselves, who look at me like I'm talking Moon Speak.
I just wish that I didn't feel like I'm the only mom who plays games that don't start with FarmVille and end with Online Poker (and most of these women will swear up and down that they are not "gamers" because these are not "real" games because they don't involve FPS or a drain hopping Italian).
Maybe that makes me immature, but then again, I pay my taxes, keep myself out of debt, budget the finances, keep the apartment clean and nice, and do basic car and bicycle maintenance myself. Just because I also enjoy gaming, composing music, creative writing, drawing comics and other assorted fun stuff doesn't mean that I am somehow not an adult.
So what about you? Where are you on the "continuum" of maturity? Do people consider you mature and adult? Or are you still dealing with disrespect from those around you because of your desires and habits?
Me expected to be mature... HahahahHAHAHAhahHAHAHAHAhahaMuhahahaha *Wheeze cough hack* I'm sorry but I'm just so eccentric that some people probably think I'm retarded.
Anyway, last time I checked most people are fairly miserable when they try to be someone they're not. I enjoy what I do because it's fun, and not because it's expected for me. If maturity is based on how normal you're expected to be, then I'm probably the most immature person I know. That's not to say I'm a jerk (well I'm mostly not a jerk), or disrepectful, I just don't do what people expect me to do. I for example on my 18th birthday will buy a pack of cigarettes and then toss them out before I even open it just to buy a pack of cigarettes. On my 21st birthday, I plan to go to a bar and order a glass of milk just to say I drank from a bar.
Anyway it's late, I'm tired, and I want to eat apple pie. Great blog and good night.
"And this brings me to another thought-why isn't gaming allowed to be something a mature adult can play?"
I am sure you are getting this in your experiences, but a few years ago the average "gamer" was 25 or 26 years of age. This means for every 12 year old gamer, there has to be a gamer that is 38 years old to get to the average (or we could use median age, slightly different) age.
I think now more than ever, gaming is seen as an acceptable hobby for adults, since your average gamer is an adult, and in order to get to that, a majority of gamers would have to not only be adults, but well past the age of 18 as well.
I preffer gaming because it is a great experience to game
I thinks its an age thing more than a sex thing, but I can't speak entirely. I know people have definately expected me to wane off games by now... They're in for disapointment.
Interesting blog...as a 23 year old married woman i can relate. I can't say i've had the same experiences all around, but i do have a few friends and relatives that still think of games as a child's pass-time.
But by the same token, i know quite a few women and men pass their thirty's who play quite a bit. Personally, i've never viewed gaming as a kid thing, and i've never been judged as immature because of it. :)
(Although, in my own opinion i don't really act too mature. ;) )
I did play online once I didnt need the stress cause I would get irratated easily I will be honest I`m not very mature myself I have said some foul words I dont cuss as much as I used to but I cuss sometimes not a lot
I turn 21 in 3 years and anyone that tries to tell me that I'm supposed to stop playing games can shove it where the sun don't shine. Though I'm a guy so it probably won't matter. But I have noticed that as women get older they tend to care less about having fun, and more about just lazing about and expecting the man to do all the work. No offence to you girls but if that's the case there's no way in heck I'm ever getting married. I believe in equal partnership, if one person is working, then the other has to be working, so that they can both meet in the middle to pay whatever has to be paid. And plus, I have yet to meet a really cool yet fun girl that actually likes video games, all of the girls at my high school right now are air heads! Sigh @Forever Alone