As the release of Modern Warfare 2 comes upon us, our beloved industry stands at an important place in its history. This game has pushed countless games out of the holiday window, and is believed to clear $500 million in its first week alone. MW2 potentially can skyrocket gaming out the basements and bonus rooms to the most legit entertainment medium around. However we are not ready for it. Modern Warfare 2 has brought to the surface all of the things in gaming that absolutely have to change in order for our beloved hobby to take the lime light.

We are presenting this game as our Magnum Opus to the rest of society. What will they see? Will the rest of the world be able to see past all the racist bigots that spew obscenities and slurs during multiplayer matches, or will they be able to see past the gunning down of unarmed citizens in an airport? Our game will show the world we hate violence and war but literally *** everything up on the world with rockets and bullets, and even the stuff we put into space! Its not something that can be embraced from kids from 1-92.

But that makes sense to us. Gamers want to be mature. Call of Duty (or any shooter for that matter) makes our metaphorical dicks get bigger, makes us think that we are mature because our graphics are realistic ( = brown?) and we can make things go boom. In our quest to make the rest of the world think we are legit, we have hindered ourselves by being ultra-violent in craft, and douchebags in culture.


We all remember that jerk Jack Thompson. He was a real ***. He wanted to remove all violent video games and pretty much be Kyle's mom from South Park. At the same time though, I wish he had succeeded. Our insistence on murder has made us lose sight of what is fun. Think about your favorite movies. I'm sure you have some of those were you say "Oh so and so is so bad ass that move is awesome!". I would bet that the ones that you really hold close to your heart are the ones that put a smile on not just your face, but a smile on the people around you faces as well. I've never been around a person watching Raiders of the Lost Ark that doesn't have a big ass smile on their face after the giant ball chase scene. The same goes for Rocky, Star Wars, Forrest Gump. Those movies touch the very soul of the person in a special way. These movies are just plain fun and enjoyable no matter who watches them.

Very few games are like that. I have fun playing Team Fortress 2 because I am able to chat with my friends, team up, blow *** up, and enjoy a really rich and stylized world. There is this one special person that I know will never let me down. His name is Super Mario. Have you ever asked someone why they thought Mario was so *** fun? You won't get an answer like "Well the game has awesome mechanics" or "Oh the story is phenomenal". Most likely you will get a blank stare and the response of "I don't know. Its Mario."

Even the cover looks like a *** ton of fun.

The hell of it is, COD fans are saying that Mario needs to die! If anything, Mario needs to go toe to toe with Modern Warfare 2 and say "This is what gaming is really about! Its about pure unfiltered fun!" The public is going to scared stiff when they try to join into the current gaming culture. They are gonna hear words that they will want to bathe themselves. THESE PEOPLE ARE BAD MOUTHING MARIO! I know some of you reading this will say "*** mario, hes 4 ***" but the rest of the world stops and daydreams when they hear the words Mario, plumber, Itallian, Mushroom within two sentences of each other.

Look at how we are tearing each other apart over this *** game. Console gamers are trolling PC gamers like crazy. Guess what, PC gamers have a right to be pissed off. First, they raise the price on them, then they don't offer special PC editions, and then the defining factor of PC gaming is removed from the game! All of those was done with a big giant finger pointed in their direction by Infinity Ward. At least with the Left 4 Dead 2 boycott, Valve actually gave enough of a *** about their loyal customers to invite the leaders to play a build. Many gamers don't care about Infinity Ward's bold uses of offensive language in promotional material because they love the words they use, or don't want to be emasculated because in their mind, standing up for *** an pussies makes them either a "***" or a ".***".

You Know... I've Learned something today....

You know, I've learned something today guys; I really love Mario games. Mario is one of the few things that I can consistently rely on to be fun and bring me joy. If Modern Warfare 2 endangers the creation of more games colorful and fun games that lack *** followers, then I hope it comes out and its just like COD4 with new guns.