The Wii, everybodies favorite motion-controlled console has some, (if not billions) of good games. But sometimes I think that there are some alternative uses for the console. Here they are.

5. Midget Baseball

Ah, the standard baseball bat. Really long and heavy, and very unfriendly to short people. I mean, if you are three feet tall, you are going to give yourself a triple hernia by swinging one of these things. If we take the small Wii remote, melt the plastic casing of the console into a ball, we have a baseball bat and ball.

Anyway, it's recycling. Now if we could only find a use for Wii Balance Board.

4. Weapons

Let's face it, our government is broke. Yet, we aren't too broke to steal  a few Wii blasters and spray paint. All we have to do is spray praint a Wii Blaster and cut a hole down the controller with a torch. We stick a firecracker or a maybe a roman candle in there, and then bam! We have a gun from Planet of the Apes.

3. Physical Therapy


See here, you know those long sticks you'd walk across in preschool to gain balance? Well, there's no motivation for walking across it. "Oh, wow, I walked across it, amazing." With the Wii balanced board  on a bar, if you lose your balance, you have to play whatever game comes with it. That's motivation enough to not fall off.

2. Anger Management

Hard time today, maybe your sick of your pesky neighbor. Don't worry, you can just throw Wii's at whatever is the object of your frustration, (I would advise not throwing it at people.) By destroying something as useless as a Wii, you save any later grief related to a destruction of one's property.

1. Console Crash-Test

 Ah, crap man. You crashed your car. But before you go and get all hot and bothered about your own physical health, you should really be able to have piece in the fact that the console you have in your front seat isn't destroyed.

Luckily, someone read my blog and tested crashing into a wall with a Wii in your car. Because of this, your console will still be functional, even if your body isn't.