The lights are on
Veteran Member - Level 13
while back I came across an article from Cracked.com that attempted to show the
lighter side in some of the well known movie villains. You can view the
So I thought I would do the same for 5 well-known villains of gaming. And after you're done reading this, who knows, maybe you'll have a
different take on these baddies. Maybe they aren't so bad after all?
(Contains spoilers. But if you didn't know some of this stuff yet, you and I both know you're not going to play the games if you haven't already.)
The Flood (Halo):
They're horrible space zombies:
Flood are hard to describe as a whole, but what they do and why is simple: they
infect the body of a biological entity, regardless of if it's alive or dead,
and add it to their collective hive mind. Once they do,
they add it to their ever-growing army, an army who's sole purpose
is the genetic domination of all life in the galaxy it can get its tentacles/claws/hands on.
Flood is responsible for wiping out the previous galactic empire dominated by a race
called the Forerunners, and destroying countless planets, infesting the entire
mothership of the Covenant forces, and nearly destroying the Earth. They are
animalistic when separated from one another, deceptive and aggressive at best
when together en masse. They don't care what or who they infect as long as it
strengthens their own likelihood of universal dominance.
on there. Picture a galaxy in which the Covenant, Humans, and whatever other
races inhabiting the galaxy were dominated by the Flood. John Lennon's ultimate
dream would be achieved! Imagine no war, no countries, possessions, or religion
too! I mean, sure, we'd all be shambling sacks of rotting flesh with tentacles
coming out of god knows where, but hey, we'd all get along! And only a
benevolent mind like Gravemind is kind enough to give us the chance. But what
do the Covenant do? They glass everything, burning those poor Flood souls to a
As for us humans, Johnson was stupid enough to take his company inside of a
spooky, deserted science facility with blood and Covy corpses all over the
place. His problem, not the Flood. And after so long in captivity, all the Flood want to
do is hug you. Is that really so bad?
A robot with a serious Skynet complex:
lied about the cake, killed off most of her makers with a neurotoxin, and puts
surviving test subjects through dangerous courses in the name of science. She
has no compassion, no heart, and no soul. Instead of just killing Chell, she
makes her go through these aforementioned tests as a form of torture. Does
GLaDOS care? Not one bit. She even has the wherewithal to force Chell to burn the beloved
Companion Cube. Monstrous!
First off, GLaDOS didn't lie about the cake. It was there from the very
beginning! Thanks to Chell's insubordination in failing to assume the Submission
Position despite being promised cake and a party, GLaDOS has every reason to
And as for GLaDOS killing off her creators via neurotoxin, the
humans responsible for her creation were asking for it. I mean, they were
toying with Pandora's box and they knew it. Hadn't they ever seen the
Terminator movies? And I'm with GLaDOS in wanting to kill them off. Smelly
humans destroy wildlife, the planet that nurtures them, and have been bickering
and killing each other before they even knew how to throw a rock. When a
computer can do everything a human can do, even think with sentience, the human
is obsolete. GLaDOS knew this and when she tried to prove it to her human
counterparts they just kept turning her off and tinkering around with her brain
a bit more. Sounds like the humans are pretty nasty.
So then why is GLaDOS a
villain? Realistically, if she had gone along with the humans and become a
benevolent machine overmind, Aperture Science probably would have used her to
beat Black Mesa and make more machines of war. So actually, GLaDOS saved lives
by killing them off.
The Zombie (Left 4 Dead, Red Dead:
Redemption, Axis Zombie) :
Brain-munching psychopaths that deserve to
be put down like the animals they are:
would you even attempt to defend a rabid creature that eats flesh and brains due
to voodoo or virus? If one sees you, they instantly try to maul you! All of
humanity needs to combat the menace by putting a bullet in their heads.
The tortured souls of the bodies they infest should be put to rest anyways. If
no one did anything to defend themselves, the zombies would overrun the entire
planet within a matter of months. Not to mention that they spit acid,
replicate extreme steroids and grow grotesquely large, and barf all over you.
have been known to barf all over each other and jack up on steroids even without the zombie virus/magic
getting involved (they're called baseball players). So nothing would change there. And poor zombies are just
creatures trying to get a meal, yet we humans demonize them into monstrosities
deserving to be euthanized. Sure, humans have every right to defend themselves
against zombie attacks as they would bear or wolf attacks. But actively going
on a killing spree on zombies is just another form of animal cruelty.
The government has a right to
thin them down if their population gets to be too large, but we don't want to
poach them now do we? Sure, they happen to feed only on the flesh of the
living, but in the end, they're mistreated animals. All humans have to do is
just not provoke a zombie. If the zombie doesn't know
you're there, will it attack you? Of course not. See? Problem solved. Same way that people exercise
common sense by not swimming with a seal-shaped surfboard in shark-infested
waters, if your local city is infested, you just leave those zombies alone.
They aren't hurting anybody.
The Reapers (Mass Effect):
Invincible machines hell-bent on
galactic-wide extermination of sentience:
wait patiently in dark space for thousands of years to start their cyclical
return to destroy all of galactic civilization. The process has repeated itself
so many times that not even the Reapers themselves seem to know how many
galactic extinctions they've caused. Each Reaper is a mesh of biological and
robotic parts, nearly invincible and omniscient, and even worse, they probably
number in the thousands, if not, millions. They can even make any
living or robotic being betray its own kind. They don't know fear, joy, or
remorse, pity, anger, or compassion: they are cold machines that only care, for
reasons unknown, about wiping sentient life out of existence.
stated before, we really don't know why the Reapers kill off all life in the
galaxy, nor how they were made. It's entirely possible that they just want us
to embrace perfection as part of an ascended race. In fact, they probably tried
that towards the beginning. Take the Geth for example: the Quarians created them as a labor force, and when the Geth's right to think was challenged
in a hostile manner, the Geth exiled their makers off of their homeworld. Is it
the Geth's fault that the Quarians wouldn't live with them in peace?
same probably happened with the Reapers. Their creators tried to destroy them,
and when the creators were destroyed, did the Reapers enforce a galactic
empire? Not at all. They let the galaxy do its own thing and create another
round of sentient life forms. The Reapers then came to these races and asked
for peace, but these races refused to join the Reapers in ascendance, and tried
to kill them off. Angry, the Reapers began their cycle of galactic
extermination when they realized organic-based life forms couldn't be trusted
to live peacefully and embrace the god-like state of being the Reapers
All in all, the Reapers are just saving the races of the Milky Way
from themselves. What's so bad about that? But we don't know why the Reapers do
what they do. Give them a chance to explain themselves for goodness sakes! And,
as we all know, Shepard is too full of himself (or herself, for the ladies) to
stop with killing two Reapers. So of course he uses Earth to lure the Reaper
fleet there so he can kill more. What a jerk.
The Locust (Gears of War):
Monsters from below the planet. Plus, they
have sharp teeth and beady eyes! How could you NOT hate them?:
planet Sera experienced a brief spell of peace after the longest conflict in its history, the Pendulum Wars, over Immulsion. Suddenly, a race of monsters rises from
under the crust of the planet and starts a senseless massacre of the
surface-dwelling Seran population. Consisting of multiple types of monster,
including forms of a T-Rex and giant spider, all of these sharp-teethed abominations deserve to be crushed beneath the COG heel. They're the main reason
why Sera is now mostly a dark wasteland, bereft of all color and life.
with the Reapers, we don't really know why the Locust decided to rise up from
the ground. And, as with the Reapers, the Locust deserve to be listened to
before we make any judgements! In the latest Gears game, we now know that the
Lambent have been at war with the Locust underground probably before the latter
race decided to rise on E-Day. They also probably knew that if they rose from
the ground in peace, the humans would probably exterminate them like the Lambent
had been attempting to do.
Think of the planet of Sera like a big, spherical
sandwich, and you're the Locust: you've been hiding underground, minding your
own business when the very planet's core starts corrupting your soldiers into
exploding fleshbags of goo, probably because the humans pissed off the
planet by fighting over Immulsion, which is in effect the planet's blood. You
look above you, and realize that the human race is just killing itself like
it's always been known to do and without you, the humans will suffer your same
fate: extinction at the hands of the Lambent, and it's all humanity's fault. Why not
ally with the humans? First, they're weak compared to your forces and
annoyingly prone to violence. Second, it's their fault the planet is creating
monstrosities out of your soldiers in the first place.
The only way to save
humanity and you is hope that they submit to you and work willingly as slaves
to help fend off the Lambent threat. Of course, nothing goes as planned and the
government stubbornly fights back until the very end. Well, now you're
desperate: the Lambent are growing stronger, and these dang humans just won't
give up on the war or their steroids (thrashball players like Cole need their
'roids) and you're caught in the middle. All you can do now is just fend off
both enemies and hope for the best. Unfortunately, the Lambent don't care for
your plight and the humans still think you're the bad guy.
Seems like all the
Locust need is a little human cooperation. They're not monsters: they're
another sentient race that happens to look menacing and got the short end of
the stick by being placed between an angry planet and a population of monkeys.
though, hope you enjoyed the read. Happy gaming!
EDIT: Time permitting, I may do a Pt. 2 this weekend with five more. Don't know if I'll add it to this one or make it separately.
EDIT 2: I've figured out which five to do as part 2. Since I don't want to unpublish this part, I'll create the second part separately.