According to the poster, Resident Evil: Apocalypse is a movie about a woman wandering a graveyard in a bath towel, who has a photographic memory. I hope no one was disappointed.

For this movie, Paul WS Anderson was too busy working on AVP: Aliens Vs. Predator to direct, so he instead wrote up a script and handed it to second unit director Alexander Witt to direct. Between the barely comprehensible fight sequences and the often confusing editing, it's not hard to imagine why Witt was back to being only a second unit director after this. Not that he'd been given greatest script to shoot from, mind you.

For the sequel, Anderson decided to include a few characters from the videogames for fan service. The result is a pretty awkward, with Alice and Jill almost in competition over whose movie it is. To fill out the cast, Anderson also included a brand new character named L.J., who serves as a Richard Pryor-esque character for the group.

While the story isn't as infuriatingly confusing on a first viewing like Resident Evil was, it's still filled with numerous questions as to why any of this is happening at all.


- How did the drivers of the cement truck the SUV not see each other on streets that look to have been otherwise completely devoid of vehicles, especially when they appear to have been driving at such a low speed?

- Why would anyone think imitating Mission: Impossible but connecting the cord to a helicopter instead would be a good idea?

- How did Alice know there was anyone in the church in need of rescuing before she smashed in through the window with a motorcycle?

- How did buried bodies in the cemetery get infected?

- How has that unguarded gun shop not already been looted?

- How exactly does Umbrella plan to convince the authorities that a bomb detonation was a reactor meltdown?

- Does Umbrella have a specific motivation for anything they're doing, beyond being just evil? I see no financial benefit to anything of their actions.

- How did everyone in the helicopter other than Alice manage to survive the crash?

- Why did they just leave Alice's body? If they left it because they assumed she was dead, why did they later infiltrate Umbrella to rescue her? How would they know she was alive?

- How did they infiltrate Umbrella? How did they know she would be there?

- How did they know she would wake up on that day, and escape at that very moment?

- How is Paul W.S. Anderson allowed to keep writing movies?

But I think possibly the worst scene is the ham-fisted callback to Mortal Kombat when Alice is forced to fight a guy in a cheap, clunky Nemesis suit, and at the end Not-Wesker shouts at her to "Finish Him!" The sequence is made that much worse by Witt's inability to direct fight scenes.

Resident Evil: Apocalypse also wins my award for most bewildering instance of pandering in an action movie ever for the scene with the topless zombie hookers.