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A Letter to Mercurysteam

Author's Note: My next major blog is another list, so I figured I'd do a short little blog here that I came up with last night. I wanted to break up the monotony of lists too. I know you don't wanna read a bunch of lists. This blog is also supposed to be humorous, don't take it too seriously, but the feelings are real, just exaggerated. Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Dear MercurySteam,

I've been playing Castlevania: Lords of Shadow and I have only two words: FREAKIN' BOSSES. I mean really, I'm only on chapter 4, but geez, these bosses are tough! Maybe I'm just a bad gamer, I don't know; all I know is that I almost broke my TV fighting these dang beasts. The two titans or whatever were fine. It was hard, I got mad, but you know what, it's fine. They had some tough moments, but with perseverance I got them.

Now we enter the Lord of Lycans, Cornell, one of the Lords of Shadow. Man I HATE this guy! His first form, he's okay. He has some fast attacks, he jumps around, he does an area of effect attack and of course he changes up his patterns as soon you almost have your combo chain done! But hey, that's a typical boss for you right? After almost wiping out my entire life bar and making me drain all of my magic, I finally kill the guy! Yay, I'm done right?

WRONG! Nope, he turns into the actual Lycan for which he's named for. Yep, a giant flaming werewolf! So, what's worse than the first form, well now is AOE attack has like ZERO tell! You have almost no time to move! And it's not really that cheap, its just you have to be really good at catching that movement, which, guess what... I'M NOT! Then he is fast, just as fast as his first form and he can dash around the field like crazy! And then, if you continue, which you almost certainly will, you only get half life! And no magic, oh happy day. So finally, after finishing off this guy he looks like he's dying. I began to cheer, and then another form in which I have to destroy pillars...

Really, destroying pillars that give him energy!? I would say that it's lame, but I don't really want to talk bad about this fight! I liked it, but man, this is dragging it on for almost no reason. I don't get it. Anyway, this part also trolls you! You guys are trolls! The first pillar takes one hit, then two, then the next three, but the rest; it just takes a lot! I thought there was a pattern there, but there isn't. Nope, just hit them while avoiding his SUPER powerful attacks! Finally, cue the QTE and then bam!

So, anyway, you guys drove me crazy for hours! It was worth it to move on though, and now I'm on to chapter 4! I'll write you later, after I get destroyed by more of your evil bosses!

                                                                                                                                                Sincerely,                                                                                                                                                                - blaze6106

 

 

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