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Admitting My Achievement Shame


I've never been ashamed of my achievement score, despite the hundreds of hours I've spent performing arbitrary tasks and playing terrible games to inflate it. I spent far too much time making Spider-Man swing around a pole long enough to get the "Mega Web Swinger" achievement. I've played through entire games based on kid's movies like Monsters vs. Aliens or Ice Age. Once I started working here at Game Informer, I dug up old sports titles and easy achievement fodder like TMNT or Night at the Museum II and played them far longer than I should.

However shameful these games were at times, the achievements were always genuine. I never employed any method of trickery or cheating to skirt around the necessary task. However, my perfect record is tarnished by what I did last week, and my score may require an asterisk from this point on. Granted, it's only a drop in the bucket compared to my overall score, but 1,500 points out of nearly 90,000 are now essentially falsified.

I learned not long ago that I can download games on Steam and earn achievement points from them, as long as they're branded "Games for Windows Live." Being the achievement *** I am, I started playing the PC versions of games like Bioshock 2 and Street Fighter IV. I don't have a gaming computer, so they didn't run great, but I was still able to get a few achievements from them.

Then I saw that Fallout 3 was on the GFWL list. I absolutely love that game, and spent 80+ hours playing through the 360 version and its five expansion packs. I did a quick Google search to make sure Fallout 3 would allow me to get Live achievements, and I stumbled upon an interesting forum thread. It stated that you could simply type in command lines in the game to unlock every achievement. This thread was over a year old, and I thought "Surely that doesn't still work." I tried it, and...it did.

So now I still have my ludicrous achievement score, but there is a pesky 1,500 points that I didn't earn. I wish I could take them back so the score would be 100% accurate (readers of a previous post of mine should know my obsession with statistical accuracy), but it looks like they're there to stay. I've never once cheated in a multiplayer game or even cheated for achievements prior to this Fallout 3 thing, but there's no getting around the fact that I didn't earn those points.

I've thought about it, and I think I'm done with playing games solely for achievements. I don't think I'll be playing through any NCAA games from 2007 or crappy movie-based games anymore, and I'm resigning my quest to beat Jeff Cork's gamerscore by E3. I'll probably still spend time going for achievements in games that I genuinely enjoy, but I'm done with the time-wasting "achievements for achievements sake" stuff. Rather, I'll be taking the Joe Juba approach by only spending extra time on games that I want to keep playing after I finish them.

My score won't be going up anytime soon, as the "commission" here at Game Informer (a group that seems to be consisting of Reiner and Jeff Cork) has decided that I am banned from checking games out from the vault for 50 days. But maybe my stupid move turns out to be for the best if it gets me off my achievement obsession. I'll be wasting less time on crappy games, and more time focusing on the AAA titles and my personal favorites. If you ever see me on XBL playing something like Jumper or Avatar, feel free to call me on my BS.

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Comments
  • Staff

    I am calling you on your BS.

  • Staff

    The only thing more shameful than your actions is your Gamertag. TheExcitableBoy? Dan, it's time you become a man.

  • ...

    wait so this really happened? and that cheat works?

    Why does a cheat like that even exsist? What the hell is the point of achivements in the first place if something like that works?

    I don't think this is entirly your fault anymore, but the fault of having such a moronic cheat in the game in the first place. Yes, the cat got killed by his curiosity, however the question still stands why was the item of curioso there in the first place?

  • Its crazy that they even have cheats like this.  

  • Staff

    Bertz, I'd expect you to get the gamertag reference.

  • I wish I could post a pic of Dr Hax pointing and screaming at you...instead enjoy my impression:

    HAAAAAAAAAAAX!

    xD Youre actually punished for this? I can understand looking down upon it, but yea....you mut have been close to beating said staffer eh? lmao better luck next time guy

  • I'm actually shocked to hear there is a cheat like that. I never thought you could do that. But hey, maybe try to tell microsoft? Nvm, I wouldn't do that, they ban people for having modded hard drives.

    Seriously though, I thought microsoft made games almost cheatproof. Or at least didn't allow them to get achievements if they used cheats. Dan, this will all go away if you smack yourself so hard you become unconscious.
  • You're going down, Ryckert.  I've already started an online petition that I'm sure will get one thousand real signatures and one hundred thousand more from hacked accounts the world over...

  • Staff
    I don't even have time to talk about all the ways in which this pathetic post embarrasses you, Dan. So here's the top 3: 1) You admitted to me just this morning that in order to get the Mega Web Swinger achievement, you taped down the button on your controller. So, all the talk about the time "you" invested into getting achievements without any "trickery" (Fallout 3 hacking notwithstanding) is highly suspect. 2) Bad-mouthing the "commission," otherwise known as "your two immediate supervisors." 3) The sympathy card: "Oh, boo-hoo! My life is so hard; I get paid to play video games and write about them! But because I'm banned from check-out, I can't continue to horde all of the most popular games (knowingy exceeding the Vault's two-at-a-time limit, no less). Pity me!"
  • I Believe in Dan Ryckert.

  • Staff

    I will respond to one of Joe's complaints - the Spider-Man one.

    Yes, I DID tape my controller to try to help me get the Mega Web Swinger achievement. However, it was after I had already beat the game, and I was extremely close to getting it anyways. I put tape on my controller hoping that I could just leave it with him swinging around a pole, but it kept screwing up and stopping the motion, so I probably only got 5-10% of the achievement thanks to that.

  • Every time someone cheats, an angel gets its wings... torn from it's back and then are thrown out of a plane over a large metropolitan area.

    P.S. I myself am responsible for several angel deaths myself. But I never cheated to aid a gamerscore or nothin'. I don't care about that. I just do cheats on like, GTA and Saints Row


  • Looks like you have been taking notes from all the recent celebrity public apologies.  You admitted it, you feel terrible and this is going to make you a better person.  No one buys their BS so why should we believe you.  

    P.S.

    I think Darren Sproles just scored another touchdown against Olathe East.  

  • Staff

    Just because it's a Warren Zevon reference doesn't stop it from making you sound like a dandy.

  • Dan, if you ever feel like playing on the PC.... Don't, mods are way too tempting most of the time

  • Maybe you should counter act this by actually playing through the PC version of Fallout 3 and pseudo-earn all of the achievements. I mean, you won't know if you earn them for sure, but it's the thought the counts. Put your back into it, Ryckert!

  • that doesn't stop me though

  • I can't wait for the South Park episode parodying this issue.

  • Staff

    Come one guys, go easy on Dan -- he only made 72 consecutive mistakes...

  • Staff

    gameinformer.com/.../danssuspension.aspx

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