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The Wrath Of Knack
Sony Japan Studio's new family-friendly hero is almost here, but players still don't know much about the adventure that awaits him. Rather than wait a few more days to find out the official story, I figured I'd make an educated guess at the plot based on the latest screens.
I haven't been following Knack's development as closely as some gamers, but I am an expert at piecing together plots from the slimmest of details. I traced an unfortunate series of events in Max Payne's life, uncovered some shocking details from Kratos' past, and even supplied Namco Bandai with better backstories for Soulcalibur V. Sussing out Knack's story was a little trickier, but I think I've nailed it.
We start with baby Knack in a laboratory. I'm guessing it's one of those Astro Boy deals where a gifted scientist lost his child and then tried to create a robot replacement. I'm still not sure why his head is a bucket, though – maybe the scientist isn't that gifted after all.
Over the years, Knack grows up, becoming stronger and smarter than his fashion-challenged father scientist. A mega corporation takes notice; its name is...Mega Corporation.
Hmm...it appears the scientist's son isn't dead after all. Maybe he's just a huge disappointment. Either way, Knack and his human father and brother are invited to Mega Corporation for a friendly chat about science and technology. What could possibly go wrong?
It's a trap! Knack's human family is sliced to pieces with deadly laser beams! Luckily, Knack can turn into glass, allowing the beams to pass right through him.
Poor little Knack barely outruns the guards' missiles as he escapes Mega Corporation's headquarters.
Reeling from the loss of his family (turns out it's a reverse-Astro Boy story), Knack seeks refuge in an ancient temple.
While mediating with some wise old monks, Knack discovers he has the ability to suck objects into his body. Thankfully, the monks have a lot of garbage lying around.
After growing considerably in size and strength, Knack is ready for revenge.
Knack returns to Mega Corporation. This time he's prepared for a fight; the guards with toy laser swords don't stand a chance.
After killing off all of the guards, Knack crushes Mega Corporation's CEO (who conducts all of his business in a super robot suit, naturally). There are no survivors.
After leaving Mega Corporation in flames, Knack roams the land for more civilizations to destroy. First up: a wooden fortress. Those arrows are no match for Knack – he's not solid enough for them to stick in him. Duh!
Holy crap – Knack found Shrek! And he punched the clothes right off him!
Knack then ruthlessly slaughters the rest of Shrek's family with a devastating tornado attack. It may seem cruel, but he's still dealing with a lot of unresolved issues, so don't judge him too harshly.
Knack then hunts down and kills all the other orcs in Shrekland, including this nerdy yellow orc. I'm guessing he didn't put up much of a fight.
After leaving Shrekland, Knack invades a nearby human kingdom. The townsfolk have no idea of the horrors that await them...
Knack climbs the king's tower, unconcerned with all the noise his creaking wooden body makes...
Puny human guards are no match for giant flaming Knack!
Inside the palace, Knack disembowels the king and absorbs the power from his blood. He dispatches the last few enslaved orc guards on the way out, because by this point he's pretty much a jerk.
While leaving the palace, Knack stops by an arboretum, because even monsters like flowers.
Now who's left to kill?!
How about the Thing from the Fantastic Four? "Time for a clobbering!" ...or whatever that dumb rock guy says.
Knack then boards the S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier and kills all the Avengers! Why, Knack? Why?
With no one left to stop him, Knack devastates earth's largest cities, bringing the world's superpowers to their knees. King Kong ain't got sh-- on Knack.
Then Knack turns into a Decepticon! Even I didn't see that one coming!
Knack travels the galaxy, endlessly searching for more forms of sentient life to literally beat the pants off of. The End.
Learn a little about Knack's real story and find out how it fares as a PS4 launch title by reading Matt Helgeson's review.
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