The lights are on
BioWare's Mass Effect 3 has been grabbing its share of headlines lately, though not for reasons the studio may have been hoping for. An outspoken group of fans has been raking the game over the coals for what they say is a disappointing ending filled with plot holes. Some have voiced their displeasure via petitions, while one particularly incensed gamer has taken his complaints to the Federal Trade Commission. BioWare has responded, saying that it's in the process of revisiting the trilogy's ending. But why stop there? We've got a list of things that BioWare should put on its to-do list.
1. Redo Dragon Age 2All of it.
2. Bring Back Every Crew Member Who Has Died In The Mass Effect TrilogyDeath is sad and gamers don’t like sad things! Except for Kaiden. F-- that guy.
3. Create Explicit Sex Scenes in Mass EffectFox News kept insisting it was there, so BioWare needs to oblige our creepy fantasies. We won't be satisfied until we see Garrus' cricket genitals.
4. Turn The Old Republic From An MMO Into A Single-Player RPGNobody likes talking to other players, unless they're mobilizing support for a ridiculous petition.
5. Where's HK-47?In the (horrible) ending of Mass Effect 3, the Illusive man needs to pull off his face, revealing that he was the fan-favorite KotOR droid all along.
6. KotOR Needs To Shock Us Each TimeEveryone knows about the whole Revan thing by now. Couldn't BioWare add a twist-generating engine, so players are surprised whenever they play it again?
7. Have male and female Shepard meet We've been waiting for this climactic event for three games, and BioWare managed to mess it up. How these two heroes have managed to avoid each other is one of the biggest plot holes in the history of everything.
8. New, Better DLC StrategyAll Mass Effect DLC should be released on day one, should be free, and should be distributed on the game disc.
9. Create New Dragon Age: Origins Party MembersWardog was the only member of the team who players didn't want to smother in camp. BioWare should--nay, must--revisit the party and replace each one with a different breed of canine.
10. Casey Hudson Would Look Better As A Blonde
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Lol so true if only the gamers that were involved in that dumb petition would actually pay attention to the crap that matters, I bet the world would be a better place.
This is pretty funny. Well done guys.
The gaming community has opened a can of worms here. I don't think BioWare is doing anything they didn't plan to do in the first place, but the crud surrounding it is just ridiculous. I wish the angry people would do some research before complaining and demanding change.
In the event that BioWare is doing something they didn't plan on though, this is an apt and amusingly sarcastic criticism of them.
Well. This was hilarious.
Is this mostly for the trollz? xD
I think I might start a petition for redoing Dragon Age II now.
I lol'd so hard. Especially @ Casey :P
I thought SW:TOR was a single player RPG. Since no one is playing it.
Hah, "twist generating engine." That's awesome!
Way to rip me off guise
This is hilarious.