The lights are on
Gaming history is swollen with publisher feuds, lewd advertising, and stupid slogans. We've collected some of the worst video game slogans to ever flash before gamers' eyes. Some are immediately groan-inducing, while others make you wish you were a fly on the wall at marketing brainstorm sessions. No matter the year, the publisher, or the system, there have always been awful slogans.
When you're Nintendo, simply being Nintendo is usually enough to sell units. However, that's never stopped the company from colorful advertising campaigns.
"Now you're playing with power." - Nintendo Entertainment System
This one is a classic, but the later iterations were just lazy. This is the equivalent of handing in the same class paper for 7th, 8th, and 9th grade, and just changing the date:
"Now you're playing with power - portable power!"- Game Boy
"Now you're playing with power - super power!"- Super Nintendo
"Get N or get out."- Nintendo 64
I thought the in-your-face, too cool for school advertising was a Sega thing. Guess not.
"Touching is good."- Nintendo DS
We understand that communicating your product's key feature - in this case a touch screen - is important, but maybe a slogan that doesn't encourage molestation is preferred.
Sega's slogan legacy would be nothing without Nintendo. This console manufacturer's aggressive advertising technique is as much about boasting as it is bashing the competition.
"Genesis does what Nintendon't."- Sega Genesis
The clever minds at Sega decided to make a contraction out of Nintendo's name to make a slam. Was the sad grammar-based joke worth advertising the competition in their slogan? Probably not.
"Welcome to the next level."- Sega Genesis
As soon as Nintendo made the leap into the 16-bit era Sega had to change its aggressive slogan. This slogan suggests the Genesis is the next best thing, but it felt like a cowardly step backward.
"The more you play it, the harder it gets."- Mega Drive
We don't really know how much can be said about this European Genesis ad that isn't communicated in the picture.
"Up to 6 billion players."- Sega Dreamcast
...but only 12 are playing Dreamcast.
"It's thinking."- Sega Dreamcast
Yes, it was probably thinking about how nobody purchased it.[PageBreak]
While the Commodore 64 and other Amiga consoles may only be a name of fading familiarity to younger gamers, the company's lofty and biting slogans should live on.
"To be this good will take Sega ages."- Amiga CD-32
Sega's boisterous slogan is served back to them with cold brutality. Right next to one of their headquarters, to boot!
"Only Amiga makes it possible."- Amiga Commodore
Amiga can make almost anything possible, except hiring a jingle singer that can memorize two lines. Seriously, she won't stop looking at the lyrics in this terrible 90s video.
While Sony's recent Kevin Butler advertising has been hilarious and awesome, they've got a sketchy track record filled with asinine spelling and creepiness.
"If you want a Saturn, your head must be in Uranus."- PlayStation
Not even the 32-bit era could kill slanderous slogans. We have it on good authority that this Sega Saturn slight was concocted by a five-year old. Don't worry, they're on timeout.
"U R Not E."- PlayStation
They only thing we weren't ready for was a slogan that cannot be read (red?).
"Dude, get your own."- PSP
We were almost certain that this was already Cheez-it's slogan.
"Play B3YOND."- PlayStation 3
How many headaches must be had before this number/letter swapping ends forever? How do you pronounce that? "Play buh-three-yond?" That's the sort of thing a stupid person says. The only thing worse are the associated commercials.
"It only does everything."- PlayStation 3
Except for that one day it did absolutely nothing.
Using the trivial quantification of how many "bits" a game console has is bad enough, but implying that gamers should do math is even worse.
"Do the math."- Atari Jaguar
No, the house of Xbox cannot escape stupid slogans, either.
"Jump in."- Xbox 360
This slogan sounds more appropriate for a McDonald's Play Land ball pit or the box of a kiddie pool.
"You are the controller."- Kinect
This slogan gets the points of the 360's motion control across, but it also sounds like a line from The Lawnmower Man.
Email the author Tim Turi, or follow on Twitter, and Game Informer.
Good stuff. The "It only does everything" and the Joystick getting harder tie for the winner.
Sega Joystick. I cried while reading it.
hahahhaha my favorite was "the more you play with it, the harder it gets." seriously, videogame marketing (with the exception of Kevin Butler (who is the man))could stand to have a swift knock to the... well, you see where i'm going with this (it rhymes, in case you still haven't gotten it :D)
The more you play with it the harder it gets? What retard did this? I guess sega really was targeting an older demographic
"It only does everything"
LOL. That was hilarious. The baby one was freakin creepy, though. D:
I also really liked the "If you want a Saturn, your head must be in Uranus" ad a lot, lol. That's exactly the kinda stuff I came up with when I was 5!
I don't see whats wrong with the DS advertisement "Touching is Good" there's nothing wrong with.... ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Wow. Uranus and erection jokes? Ugh...
I remember the baby commercial. Mostly just the feeling of confusion though.
Ha take that video gaming companies. Go hire someone actually quallyfied to write slogans.
The longer you play...the harder it gets. I cannot believe that got past a marketing meeting. haha
the ps3 baby commercial and the Jaguar were probably the weirdest.
God these are awful
***, Sony's slogans are just blatantly abysmal.
Some of us gamers aren't 12 year olds fresh from dropping out of english class.
And the Euro Genesis is just... wrong. Amiga actually gets points for owning in that HQ image.
Why in the world would anyone publish "the more you play with it the harder it gets" that's a terrible slogan unless you are intentionally trying to grasp puberty ridden teenagers who would find it funny...although I'm an adult and found it hilarious...
I can't unhear that Amiga song. Thanks the damage is done.
lol, yep you never know what goes through a developers head... or a marketers...
that ps3 baby seriously creeps me out wtf was up with that commercial?
I'm actually surprised at some of the commercials. All of them are ludicrous, but some of them actually turn out better that TV ads for so many other things, especially during cartoons (really? Twinkle Toes from Sketchers? I'm trying to watch Dragon Ball Z here!).
Also, who pronounces it "Seega?" What is that?
lol i loved the "the more you play with it, the harder it gets