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 PLATFORM: XBOX
HERE COMES THE HAMMER

ey, I’m reviewing both Driv3r and Malice this month! Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Game Informer’s semi-annual "Games That Should Have Been Released In 2001" issue! As you probably know, Malice was once one of the Xbox’s greatest hopes, and garnered reams of coverage after being showcased as part of Bill Gates’ speech during CES 2001 when he unveiled the Xbox hardware for the first time. Since then, it’s been a hard fall from grace as Malice continued to slip down the release schedules and went through publishers like J-Lo goes through husbands. Now, after all this time, it’s finally seeing the light of day and revealed in all its…mediocrity.

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a terrible game. However, it’s certainly not equipped to deal with the best of this generation’s platformers. The main reason is that it’s crippled by an over-reliance on the worst game design cliché ever invented: too much collecting. Whether it’s glow worms or orbs or gears or gold coins, you can bet your ass you’ll be collecting them in Malice. You’ll be gathering widgets like the old cat lady down the street hoards Precious Moments figurines. And then, when you finally open the door or lock or bridge, you’ll get to a new area where you’ll have to collect more crap to advance!

Hey, if that’s your bag, this game should tickle your mojo quite nicely. It’s fairly decent looking, and I did enjoy the strategy brought on by the different magical powers Malice acquires on her quest. But I have seen the future of the platformer in games like Ratchet & Clank and Jak II, and I’m never going back to the old collection grind. I’m as free as a bird now, and this bird you cannot change – not even for a spunky girl swinging a giant hammer. Malice, we should have hooked up back in the early days of the Xbox.  



JOE JUBA   4

Malice has shaken two of the pillars on which I base my day to day life: Redheads are cute, and enormous bludgeoning weapons are awesome. Nothing about this title, including the fiery-haired heroine, is visually appealing; the environments and enemies all look like they belong in the last console generation. And though you get to lug some oversized clubs and hammers, they feel clumsy and awkward instead of soul-crushingly sweet. If I am wielding an oversized cudgel and I’m not looking forward to using it, something is seriously wrong. "Boredom" or "defeat" might have been better abstract concepts after which to name this utterly derivative platformer.

5.5
CONCEPT:
A long-lost Xbox platformer surfaces with an unknown publisher
GRAPHICS:
There are some nice textures and shadowing, but overall this looks like an Xbox launch title
SOUND:
Minimal tuneage and a conspicuous absence of Gwen Stefani
PLAYABILITY:
The combat is rudimentary, and the platforming is only as hard as the camera makes it
ENTERTAINMENT:
The world moves fast, and Malice has fallen more than a few steps behind
REPLAY:
Low
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